Introspection can be useful.

Virtually all my Christian life I've strongly disliked hymns and carols. Prior to that I was relatively indifferent, accepting them as a peculiar and slightly tedious part of the "Way Things Were Done In Church". It isn't just the tunes, although musically speaking they have generally (with some exceptions) seemed turgid and dull - trying to play on the emotions in a dated and crass way. But even with the 'great hymns' (Oh for a thousand tongues springs to mind) I've had to grit my teeth and get on with it, and this has remained a puzzle for me. Now I think I have some insight.

I grew up in a baptist church. One which, when eventually confronted with the idea that God might actually want to be involved in our lives, decided that it wasn't particularly keen on the idea. Hymns were for the 'main church' while songs for worship (called choruses then, usually with a look of distain) were for use outside the main congregation.

When we married we felt released to move churches, and became involved with a 'housechurch' that was on fire for God. A guy called Steve Findlater, who joined us as a new Christian summed it up for me one Sunday morning with more accuracy than I'd imagined at the time. We had sung a hymn at the start of the meeting, and Steve's comment was "I came to church to meet God, not to sing hymns". Like him, I felt that hymns and God were exclusive. Things that had died, but had not been allowed to lie down quietly. To borrow pop-parlance, a 'rave from the grave'.

I've already been back to God about this a few times, and he's spoken quite clearly about just accepting them for others, so that was kind of sorted. However I was considering this again the other day when it finally dawned on me as to why I feel the way I do. I have always associated that style of music with people actively resisting God. Obvious really, but it's taken this long for the penny to drop. I doubt that I'll suddenly develop a great love for that style of church music, but I expect not to wrestle with it whenever a hymn comes up.

Enjoy your carols, everyone ;-)