But I do right now.
Seeing people I care about hurt because of misunderstandings, not of their making, and I'm really angry. No idea where this is going to go, and I hope sleep brings a change of heart.
*edit*
Today (Saturday) is better. However forgiveness of sin does not mean we don't live with the consequences of our actions.
Maybe you should talk to these people that are hurting.
ReplyDeleteSomeone has to have courage to offer the 1st branch to rebuild bridges
I have serious doubts that bridge building is at all welcome, on the angry shouty side at least, sadly. If that were different then I'd love to see reconciliation.
ReplyDeleteSome people need to shout, when anger takes control.
ReplyDeleteBut if you are sincere and show lobe towards them, it can only sow seeds toward reconciliation...........just may take more than one or two attempts. Maybe even 77 : )
I would have more hope if they could go and ask for unconditional forgiveness from the person who was shouted at, preferably without having to be told to do so. That would at least give them a clean conscience and a chance for everyone to move forwards.
ReplyDeleteIn my experience there are very few people who go around shouting and upsetting people for the sole reason of causing hurt. Maybe the events leading up to the incident need to be considered. Has there been hurt caused through the actions of the other party? Whilst not an excuse for aggressive behavior maybe apologies need to be made on both sides rather than just one. There is an almost authoritarian slant to your point. Surely the only reason apology should be made are through ones own realisation that their actions were wrong, not because they are "told to" however well meaning
ReplyDeleteDear anon - you seem to be very free to read my comments in what ever way suits you. Please explain how there is an authoritarian perspective in that comment.
ReplyDeleteFrom a personal perspective, asking forgiveness is only really valid if it's unconditional: when there are strings attached and a requirement to recognise their own faults, it is not forgiveness being asked for at all. So if I ask you to forgive me but require you to apologise back I have immediately invalidated my apology to you.
I am indeed free to read it way I please but in this case I just read it as it was. The comment "without being told to" to me insinuated an authoritarian stance on the matter. As for the rest of my comment I believe that every one is accountable for their own actions and should apologize accordingly. However that does require one to recognise their own downfalls. I fear if only one side of a story is taken into account nothing is ever truely resolved. No offence was ment but that is how your comment appeared to this reader.
ReplyDeleteThanks for explaining. When I said 'without being told to' I meant that they would do it spontaneously, rather than being nudged into it by someone else.
ReplyDeleteI still stand by what I said - asking forgiveness is only valid if made unconditional. When there is a requirement for the other party to reciprocate then the first party isn't actually asking to be forgiven at all - they require the other party to recognise their wrong, and that's placing conditions on the act. Saying "I'm sorry, but you did....." is actually placing blame on the other party instead of accepting it for the things that were not right in ones own actions.
As I said if responsability is not accepted and actions taken on both sides then there is little hope of moving forward without baggage, and almost certainly a recurrence of similar incidents. Ultimately God knows our hearts in all matters probably much better than we do and I am sure he is at work with all concerned, sometimes we just need to stop and wait for direction. I am sure all things are seen much simpler by God than the human eye tends to see.
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