Too damned much time for thinking.

I've just finished processing stuff - tired and my legs ache from standing all afternoon.

I finished going through a bunch of 'what if' stuff in my head relating to the future, then I went through a pile of past stuff.

I remembered Sarah when Ben and I picked her up from Sarah B's after she'd slept over that Saturday morning. I remembered the feel of her fingers as she held my hand while we were driving to Bicester village. We went to Tesco after dropping Ben off for work, and she bought mango pieces for breakfast before we went home so she could nap, change and go to work.

I remembered her in the back of the car again, nose dripping blood, little trickles of it down her face.

Damn, I miss my daughter. Now I'm crying online.

Crap.