Just heard the husband of a friend

the husband of a friend, who is also Chris's optician, was killed in an accident on Saturday. Praying for his family: the wife and children left behind.

Having worked with robots

humans are interesting in the way they continually self-calibrate.

Just spent the morning setting up some tests on the robotic system here, and was considering the way internal movements are calibrated and can drift. Living things are changing constantly as they grow, age, wear and damage. Yet almost everyone could touch a finger to the tip of their nose first go, or shovel food into their mouths without difficulty. Based on my experience with robotics, you wouldn't want to be pushing sharply pointed objects toward a small opening of uncertain size and location.

Quite remarkable really.

Bums!

To people with blog comments that require one to not only have to log in with their google account to post, but also to then require a capcha type word recognition to complete the post. Blog commented on, logged in, hit submit, then instinctively closed page after it refreshed, just as I saw the 'word' appear. Undoing close did not bring back the original text.

If you're that paranoid about what might be written then you probably don't need comments anyway. :p

A long, busy week has gone by since the last post.

I've had a headache all day, the PC bricked this morning when I went down to sort out the worship songs on it first thing (big update last night) and I've not managed a bike ride this W/E either.

Bluegh, really.

May just go, see if I can put another 'pooter together with bits laying around + a donation from the generous Mike Z.

Running Fedora 15 from a live CD

Gnome 3 looks really interesting!

It's a quite different take on a desktop and I rather like it! Icons are good, ditto screen fonts compared to previous offerings. I might actually give this a go as a dual boot sometime soon.

Customer service

On Thursday I wanted a haircut.

The hair dresser I've been using pretty much for the last 20 years is called 'Men Only' and is a little shop in Dean's court just of the high street. It's changed hands a couple of times, but without changing the character of the business - until recently.

I got to the shop around 4.45pm, and although the 'closed' sign was up, the door was unlocked and there was someone in the chair having a haircut. So I went in, only to be told "we're closed". :p

There's a shiny new hair dresser on the high street, right by the passage to the first shop, and as I wandered past they had 4 chairs, fully occupied and a queue.

So I went in.

I felt like a traitor - the other shop has been hurt by the new hair dressers, and I talked to the proprietor about it a few months back, just before she emigrated. However it's a hassle to go into Bicester just for a haircut, and I wanted to get it done there and then.

So in the new hair dressers they were quick, polite and really made it obvious that they wanted your business and were prepared to work for it. It lacked the 'personal touch', and there was no way you could have a personal conversation in a busy room, but at the same time there was a continual emphasis on service. They even finished off with a brief scalp massage (effective after a number 3 cut!).

Where will I go next time? Good question.

An African viewpoint on false prophets.

This article from the beeb is well worth reading and considering, both the obvious aspects and also how those who see religion as a source of income are perceived by others, and what it does for real Christianity.

One of the more interesting aspects of running Sabayon.

Is that it's a little like having someone else tweak you computer when you're not away.

Someone with cool ideas, and a sense of style.

Who also finds and installs new, better drivers for graphics.

A person who occasionally gets it wrong too, but fixes it next time round.


Last night there was a major update waiting to install - about 1.3Gb worth to be exact. So I let it run and went to bed - came down this morning and shut the system down immediately before making breakfast and leaving for Fleet at 6.28am.

Tonight I can see there's been a major face-lift, and I'd guess an update to the latest revision of KDE desktop. As well as new splash screens on start up some folders that were on the old desktop have been moved to home directory, there are 'border' scroll bars on the desktop, an extra 'vividness' to the colours and some new icons too. I wonder what else has been updated?

I'm running firefox with about 25 or 30 tabs open, and it's smooth and crisp. Boot times aren't the fastest, but it certainly hasn't slowed down over the months like openSUSE did, and it copes comfortably with manipulating image files in Digikam while I have several other apps running.

If I could run Microsoft office in Sabayon then I'd SERIOUSLY consider replacing OSX on the Macbook with it - just so much cleaner, quicker (on a lower spec machine) and better laid out.

Edit

It seems I've been updated to Sabayon 6 (from 5.5).

To use a colloquialism, sometimes the internet is full of win.

Birds with arms.

A bit more 'God' stuff.

One of the interesting things about the bible is how you can read it again and again and again and find different things every time. I've read it cover to cover at least 3 times now, in linear fashion, as well as continuously reading at semi-random.

I've been working through Exodus recently, and there's a whole bunch of subtle stuff tucked away in there that you'd miss so easily. Take Ex25 v9-11:

Moses and Aaron, Nadab and Abihu, and the seventy elders of Israel went up and saw the God of Israel. Under his feet was something like a pavement made of lapis lazuli, as bright blue as the sky. But God did not raise his hand against these leaders of the Israelites; they saw God, and they ate and drank.

OK - get this - these guys SAW God. And it's the OT, there was no special clothing, no exclusivity to Moses or Aaron, and they even ate & drank - presumably in His presence.

And yet 10 chapters on they're making the tabernacle, and 15 chapters on they're describing the Holy of Holies where the high priest alone could enter once a year, and where there was a risk of him dying if he did not enter righteously - and God wasn't even visibly present there!

What! Why?

I'm trying to understand this by seeing it through their eyes to see what really happened, rather than just take a historical record of perceived events that's been translated several times since original recording. I'm also trying to get my head around why God would direct these people to put in place religious stuff when He would meet with a fairly ordinary bunch of guys at the top of their present political tree.

A subtly different perspective comes woven into this.

Moses met face to face with God - God 'knew his name'. But for Aaron to come before God as high priest he has to wear all kinds of symbolic and protective clothing. I know that in a sense he was there to represent the people before God, a reason for much of the stuff tacked onto the clothing, but at the same time Moses met God face to face while Aaron was in serious danger of death if he didn't get it right (and one of his sons died for getting it wrong). Now the difference was probably God 'knowing Moses name' but what does that really mean, and how is it that Moses was 'known' and Aaron wasn't? They had both gone before Pharoh in Egypt just a little while before, with Aaron performing miraculous signs too.

To me, trying to understand this is all about trying to know who God is more, and why He does what He does.


At some stage I'll think about sovereignty, authority and politics on here, but that's for another post. Right now I need to go cut down a tree.

Chris has gone to the Splendour* women's conference in Cheltenham.

We were talking about it in the car last night, and she was really hoping for some decent teaching (she's getting desperate for something with a bit of depth to it). The one thing she was really dreading was it being like all the other women's conferences she's been to, where they try to find some hurt in the past that they can poke and then weep over (her words in the conversation). And it's all about affirmation, because as a woman you're insecure, unvalued and need to be told that you're good enough.

(cough) BS (cough)

Maybe this one will be different? I hope so for her sake.

Now here's a thought - actually teach them the truth, never mind stirring all the emotions so it seems 'real' (the conference equivalent of a Cello solo - all dark, miserable emotions and sobbing). Give them something aspirational, something which will make them stronger in Jesus and able to step up in faith. All the time you just tweak emotions you're making them dependent one the conference presenters and vulnerable, and to me, that's a form of control.

I hope this time is better.

* It should be sponsored by the makers of a certain low calorie sweetener - 'cos slim women are more attractive, right? But I suspect this is just coincidence.

Mr. Grumpy says.....

All kinds of things.

Having a difficult day, because I'm feeling down and that makes me self-centred which makes me feel down etc in a big, self-feeding loop. And the emotions are flapping in the breeze. Hard enough to leave me literally gasping at times, and sweating. And I want to hide from the things to do or wish they would just resolve themselves as I told them to. And I'm using this place as somewhere to let off steam so that I might move forward.

I wasn't kind to Chris this morning - because of the self absorption - and that hasn't helped the day. I'm sick of nepotism and being ignored/shelved and that hasn't helped the day, and I don't like my reaction to it, and THAT hasn't helped the day either. And people posting stuff about Father's day on facebook adds to the poo that seems to be around neck-level in emotional terms.

So back to depression city for a bit I guess.

And I'd like to poke in the eye the manipulator of the next image I see who used tilt-shift to make a city scene look like a model. iPhone 4 users, you are ALL guilty of lacking good taste (and not just in phone selection) - take 1 step forward and face me!

HTC cameras aren't too bad

Although these needed a little help. Images taken for a 'competition' with the theme of Broken.

This is my wallpaper at the moment

Weighs in just below 1Mb - 1680 X 1050

.

It looks like

Something exciting may happen.

But I can't say what yet - we'll just have to wait and see.

Chris's pictures from Bosnia Herzegovina

Can be found here if anyone is interested.

Do others have a theology of suffering?

This is an area I'm still trying to understand and become clear about.

Some have an understanding that if you believe 100% in the power of Jesus to heal and are walking with Him then nothing will touch you except for your own good. Others seem to think that God doesn't heal any more.

The thing that makes all this tricky is that we know that God heals people, having seen at various times healings and people becoming well. Yet at the same time, I've prayed, fasted, laid hands on for healing - and not seen it.

What about those who suffer slings and arrows at the hands of others? Is it for their good (and the good of the persecutors)?

I can find plenty of scriptures to back up a variety of different perspectives, but what I want is an understanding that integrates all of it, rather than just pushes me to one or other pole. A different theology is, I think, incomplete and will always say the wrong things about who Jesus is.

Theology is always coloured by our experiences and understandings. A theology of suffering 200 or 2000 years ago would not look like a theology of suffering now. So I want to understand suffering as it relates to 20th (and to an extent, 21st) century man. How does one reconcile suffering as a Christian in a culture that places personal comfort before all else, and demands relief from modern medicine. Also how can my understanding of suffering be 'true' in cultures that do not know comfort and care for normal people?

One of the things I constantly pray is that I might say what is right about God. Not that the things I say may be entertaining or funny or stirring, but that I can describe God as He truly is, albeit in naturally limited fashion. It seems this is another area that needs exploration.

We are 3

Again.

Which is good.

Keeping the drug habit.

We joke about growing old as being a painful process, and although it's mean half in irony, half as an observation about the emotional slings and arrows we suffer, there seems to be a physical side too.

For about 10 years now we have been using Glucosamine to keep our joints in reasonable order, and that has been beneficial. I also take Cetirizine Hydrochloride to control an allergy that's been developing for a long time (I remember having days of streaming noses even as a small kid, but they are more frequent) and iron + vitamin supplements just because.

But most recently I've found a magic sleeping tablet - Ibuprofen.

For some years I've been woken in the small hours with joint and nerve pains - you may have seen me mention here several times that my bed is 'not my friend' because of the discomfort laying still for long hours causes. Well, Ibuprofen has helped enormously and I can now sleep until 4 or 5 in the morning - sometimes even as late as 6am without waking.

The one downside is that I now seem to be popping far too many pills (in my own view - anyone who's had a serious heart condition might be envious) and that I'd like to take fewer. The problem is, I can't see any way of cutting down without it hurting one way or another, and quite possibly speeding me to even more premature immobility. So for now I'll keep active and keep taking the drugs, but I wish my body didn't feel so 'worn out' - considering that I'm not quite 50 - when I don't use them.

Do pirates really want to become admirals?

An interesting view of reality and acquisition of creative work here. Food for thought, even if it isn't necessarily correct.

And so I find myself home alone.

Chris left this morning to go with some others from the church to Bosnia Herzegovina.

:p

The upside is that I can play guitar loud if I want. The downside is both obvious and subtle.

That time of year again.

Curiously, this year we really don't feel like we want to share it with people that haven't walked with us. Maybe it's a reflection of getting over it (not really - this isn't something to 'get over').

More likely it's a mix of self-protection and having walked with some people that have sometimes been more enemy than friend over the last few years. As I sit here, I find that I don't want to be open, vulnerable with various people, and rightly or wrong, don't want to push through that either. In some ways there's been healing, in some ways I hurt more now than I did 3-4 years ago, and trust people much less.

Or maybe I'm just older and more cautious.

We might just go out and watch 'Inception' with the Somerton social club tonight. Hopefully our Byriani will be ready in a mo.

Has anyone else notice the barcodes?

Y'know, the 2 dimensional barcodes that are apprearing all over web pages and on posters & documents as well as the ordinary 1D type.

I've just downloaded an app for the HTC called (surprise) barcode scanner. It uses the camera and when the phone is aimed at the barcode it will interpret the code into either the appropriate words & numbers, or show you the link to you can follow with the phone's browser. This is not dumb.

This is so tempting

Tom Petty trib band looking for mature experienced Lead Gitwrist. You will need to be competent to play Mike Campbell parts and have a versatile tone/fx. Backing Vox would be well handy

We say mature mainly because its a committment, and anyone with young kids would be a problem, (families must come first) also someone with nagging wife or weird working shift patterns wont be suitable.

Also a Keys / Synth player needed, same goes as above. Backing Vox would be useful again

Wheels, decent gear, (not necessarily expensive, but reliable/good tone) experience, willing to rehearse, and commitment are mandatory.

Based in Oxford, but obviously within a certain radius would be fine...say 20 miles ish. Too far away would get annoying for rehearsals unless you have petrol money and time in abundance

Not that I know any Tom Petty, but I'm playing so little these days that I've effectively retired as a musician, and frankly, I'm not enjoying what I do play most of the time either. Last autumn someone visiting the church actually gave me an invite to join a band, but I turned it down because I really thought that playing in church was turning round and wanted to give myself to that.

On the drive down from Newcastle I had some Joe Bonamassa going in the car, and all the emotions that go with playing freely in worship came back. It's all very well to keep climbing back on the altar to be a living sacrifice, but sometimes you just wish the knife would come down so you didn't want to get back off again.

Yup, tonight is feeling miserable night.

What happens when we break our wedding vows?

Over the years I've known quite enough friends that have separated and divorced who really should not have had to. There's often the thought 'why did they break their vows' but it occurs to me that they probably broke the detail of their vows well before the wheels actually came off the pram. How many wives loved but didn't honour (cherish) and obey? How many husbands failed to love their wives, even though they respected them?

A quick google tells me that not everyone uses exactly those words, but the essence is frequently similar. I wonder if we fail to see the shame or pain that comes from breaking an 'easy' part of our vows while being horrified that the 'important' part is broken.

Home again.

Good to be back in my own bed with my own wife (not that the hotel provided anyone else's wife, you understand).

Newcastle is an interesting city, and one that should be on the list of any tourist that wants to catch some of the variety of Britain. Interesting people too. I learned about Maccas and Taccas after suggesting that someone's Toon accent was causing them not to be understood. He came from Sunderland, and so was a Macca (where they made ships) rather than from Newcastle (Taccas, who took the ships to have their engines fitted).

Pics now:





Small gallery here.

Just watched Alice in wonderland

Harry potter meets Avatar with a large helping of Shrek. Someone has been at the laudanum again.

A couple of pix from Holland

There's more to follow: album here.

Just read a review of the Honda Civic hybrid.

Apparently in 'economy' mode when used with care it will average about 54mpg, and over 60mpg on runs, but requires the engine to be running all the time. I have a 6 YO Peugeot 307 diesel estate that averages 54mpg and about 61-62mpg on motorway runs. Please tell me why we're bothering with hybrids that are slow, heavy, expensive and have a short working life for the battery?

Ever go somewhere and feel the vibes?

So that you KNOW you've done something that displeases someone, and it's going to take ages before things are OK again. I really do feel like I've had enough of climbing on that particular altar sometimes.