From here.
I was 49 the day before he was 47. The world was just kind of caving in a bit, really, that day. Mostly it was health and family issues, but for me, I've got to the stage where I don't really feel like celebrating my birthday any more, particularly when they're of relatively minor significance.
However I'm grateful to My brother, Peter and Alison his wife & Andy their son for remembering and sending cards, and for those who remembered me on Facebook (I have birthday notification switched off). I'm especially grateful to Chris, who despite feeling utterly rotten, really wanted to try to help me have a good day.
This isn't me having the miseries, so much as just trying to live in reality.
My mother is trying to understand Psalm 91v12 in the context of what's happened to her. Does God not work that way anymore - she could certainly be forgiven for thinking so. It's intensely frustrating, because God so clearly comes through in some areas, yet when it comes to real, miraculous put-your-hands-out-and-touch-what-God-has-done stuff, it's just not happening. I could almost chuck in and walk away, except that I know He's real and at work despite all the disappointment and apparently wasted prayer and fasting.
If anyone quotes the "my ways are higher than your ways" scripture in comments then consider yourself to have had a digital poke in the eye.
*edit*
Just after typing this and hitting post Ben came to me with a Joe Bonamassa CD (Live from nowhere in particular) as a birthday present.
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