Tonight I was introduced to someone by a friend as 'A Worship leader', a title that was haltingly whittled away at by myself over the next few minutes.
I'm not sure where this post is going, but something that's concerned me for some time now is 'who we are' in relation to the way we get introduced (or introduce ourselves - sometimes we're asked to say 'what we do' as a way of identifying ourselves).
The truth is, I do stuff in church, but I'm not the stuff I do. I do pastoral stuff sometimes (not much right now - trying to get my own life straight). I have lead worship in the past (what I'm doing now isn't really worship leading, but that's another discussion) and may even do so again. I sometimes teach, but not enough to really be a 'teacher'. I sometimes clear up cups and saucers, move chairs and sweep floors but I'm not really a janitor either.
Often we like to have a title, I think, because it can make us look good, and also because it gives us something to hide behind. This isn't something that my marvellous maturity and sense of self-worth has carried me beyond, but I have reached the stage where I don't really want to be known by whatever title makes me look good or a success. I just want to be know as me, with my weaknesses (they'll show up soon enough) and strengths (which are real enough too).
So.... My name is Toni, and I do stuff in church.